Being "Nice"
Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members of one another. Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger (Ephesians 4:25 - 26)
There are specific aspects of the faith that all believers live at some point or another. One of the key concepts is that of fraternity; a concept that was lived by the apostles and that Yeshua must’ve considered important (Romans 12:20 ; John 15:13). In those moments with other believers, it is normal for theological discussions to arouse amongst yourselves. In these times, it is important to know how the true believers of Yahweh are supposed to react and speak to one another.
The general consensus is to speak with respect and softly, almost as if it were a secret. Some would say that we aren’t supposed to hurt anyone with our own beliefs. This is based on biblical truth, that can be found in verses such as Proverbs 15:1 and 1 John 3:18. The best example comes from Colossians 4:6, which says: “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person”. In that perspective, the true believers of Yahweh will be soft in their responses and try to be as loving as possible.
Am I allowed to get mad during a theological debate?
The best way to answer that question is to refer ourselves to our Lord and Savior Yeshua. While it may seem out of context, the story of Yeshua in the temple, as recounted in Matthew 21:12 - 13 helps answer that question:
Yeshua entered the temple courts and drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the benches of those selling doves. “It is written,” he said to them, “‘My house will be called a house of prayer,’ but you are making it ‘a den of robbers.”
- Matthew 21:12 - 13
There was definitive anger in what Yeshua was doing. The reason for it was because the people who were buying and selling there had perverted the Temple. Paul is also blatant in calling out Elymas in his perversion of doctrine, saying: “You are a child of the devil and an enemy of everything that is right! You are full of all kinds of deceit and trickery. Will you never stop perverting the right ways of the Lord?” (Acts 13:10). In similar contexts, one can therefore assume that one is allowed to be angry if there is a perversion of the doctrine. In fact, as children of the Most High God, it is imperative to call out doctrine that has been perverted and falsified.
Therefore, where do we stand? In fact, we must always stand to defend the right doctrine of the Lord. Stand on the side of truth. True believers do not use gentleness as an excuse to not bring people to Yahweh: in fact, they use it to bring people to Him. Proper doctrine should not take a backseat to emotions, because salvation is what’s at stake.